Tuesday, December 19, 2006

I'm very *mopey* (for lack of a better word) today.

I know part of it is from this damn "cold" or whatever that is hanging on...not fully HERE but not fully gone. And it is making me feel SO tired. Plus that damn Aunt FLO is visiting...and bringing with her a boatload of cramps.

But on top of the physical stuff I think I'm just feeling run down emotionally, mentally, whatever. I know the holidays have a habit of doing that...and also with that, my 30th birthday. I'm NOT bummed about turning 30, anymore. No, it's not that. I think I am most upset cuz my Dad couldn't BE here for such a momentous birthday. To think, his "chicky babe" just turned THIRTY YEARS OLD. His "baby". I really would have loved to shared my day with him. And HIS birthday was December 6th, six days before mine. He would have been 56. My "old man" would have been 56. Wow. Hard to believe that he's been gone almost *FIVE* years. This will be mine, Mom and Sean's fifth Christmas WITHOUT him. *SIGH*

But on a GOOD note, I had the BEST 30th Surprise Birthday party thrown for me this past weekend!!! I can't believe Daryl was able to keep this secret...I'm sure he was bursting at the seams since late November when he began planning it! That silly boy. It's things like this that just reinforce what he means to me and how happy he makes me. But moreso it's the LITTLE things he does every single day that do that for me. I really, really wish Dad could have met him.

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