I want to cry.
No, let me re-phrase that. I already have cried today and I feel on the verge again. I've been trying to keep this all in and not upset both Big D and my mom, etc. AND by not posting about it continually. Cuz it is such a downer and I don't want to seem like a moody biatch all the time. But I'm so, so stressed out about some things going on in my life right now (and no, it's not anything to do with my fabulous Big D or the wedding)...it has to do with my mom and her situation and me constantly WORRYING about her. And where she lives. Let me just sum it all up by saying she is living in a f*^%ing crack house (becuz of her stupid drug addict brother, my uncle, who I now HATE).
And I'm feeling badly that she is not moving in with me and D (even though part of me is so, so relieved) now. But at the same time, I feel responsible and like a shit-head for not moving her in, and not helping get her into a safer, drug-free, environment. And I feel badly that now D thinks it's all his fault that she is not moving in, and that my mom will think less of him. Which is not true. It's just a really horrible situation. I wish I had the money to front her to get settled in her own apartment. But I don't.
I am going to end up worrying myself into an ulcer.
Oh, and needless to say, my eating habits this week have been atrocious. I had fast food 2 or 3 times (when I hardly EVER have it) and I've eaten enough Robins Eggs to fill like 30 Easter baskets.