Friday, December 31, 2010
Tonight we have NO plans other than chilling out at home and eating some yummy apps for dinner. Staying off the roads and away from the crazy, drunk drivers. Plus I'm just too damn tired to make it till midnight. I'm normally in bed BY ten o'clock. And I'm perfectly content to ring in the new year on a quiet--or sleeping!--note. Does that mean I'm an "old" 34-year-old now? No more wild parties, up all night? ;-) (Ok, sorry for the weird/lack of spacing in this post. My damn laptop is giving me issues.) Anyway, I went to my OBGYN check-up yesterday and all is good and on track! I only gained about 2 lbs, despite the fact that I failed my first 1-hour glucose test. Well, I shouldn't say "failed"...the glucose level was "slightly elevated" as the nurse put it. 163. So not necessarily that I have Gestational Diabetes. But I'm NOT looking forward to the damn 3-hour test. It means I have to have my Mom come over at the butt-crack of dawn and then go sit in the lab, on an EMPTY STOMACH, and get poked and prodded during those three hours. Ugh! But I'm sure it will all be fine, in the end. Also, my fundus (pretty much this is the measurement of my big 'ol belly!) is measuring at about 30 weeks which is fine considering tomorrow I'll be exactly 29 weeks! So physically, Avery and I are doing good (she is SUPER active and I love all her movements)! However, mentally? I'm a mess lately. LOTS going on in our life, not all of it good, but aiming to make it better. So that coupled with the hormonal changes, makes me very emotional at the drop of a hat. I WILL NOT miss THAT part of pregnancy, no sirreee! Daryl and I are just really looking forward to meeting our little girl and completing our family. Eleven more weeks (approx.) and counting! And we are looking forward to some positive changes in our life in the New Year...so bring it on, 2011~!!!!
Sunday, December 26, 2010
Wednesday, December 15, 2010
Friday, December 10, 2010
Just lots going on, lots of life stress, money stress, baby stress, toddler stress, friend stress...and not a great system for me to work through it all when I'm so hormonal and tired and blah.
Tuesday morning I stood in the shower, fighting back the tears as the water pounded down on me, feeling so exhausted and fatigued I just wanted to cry my heart out. I know I'm pregnant, and also working part time and chasing after a toddler and trying to keep our house from turning into a scene out of Hoarder's, but this fatigue was different. It just felt bone-weary, like my limbs were heavy and leadened. It wasn't simply a matter of being sleepy-tired, ya know? Anyway, I got out of the shower and proceeded to blow dry my hair and I was shaking like a leaf, heart racing, feeling a tightness in my chest a little similar to either anxiety or when I drink too much caffeine. I lifted my arm up above my head holding the blow dryer and had to keep lowering it back down, it felt like lifting a lead weight. I sat down on the side of the tub a couple of times to try to catch my breath, sweating, and finally giving in to tears.
I finally called my boss and told her I wasn't coming in and then i called my OBGYN to see if this warranted a visit or if I should just suffer through it. I admitted to the nurse I did have ea lot of sugar the past two days so maybe that was the reason? She said it could be sugar shock, or maybe I was anemic, but obviously she couldn't say over the phone. I was not hungry but figured shaking like that I should probably eat. So after the nurse told me they couldn't squeeze me in till 3:45pm (it was 11am) and that if I felt worse, to not be afraid to go to the ER, I went out and to the kitchen and had a granny smith apple and some cheddar cheese. Then I sat my hiney on the couch and even after getting Hunter up from his nap, I let him play on the floor while I laid back and tried to relax and slow down my pounding heart.
Of COURSE by about 3pm I finally started to feel better and by the time we made it to the doctor i was feeling much better, albeit STILL utterly exhausted. The doctor had me do bloodwork for mono, Lyme and something else...NONE Of which I figured was my problem. I personally think it could have been an anxiety attack. I've never been anemic before so I have no idea what that feels like, and I have nothing to base it on. So all week I've been tired, cranky, irritable, crying nonstop and snapping the heads off of anyone who got in my way: Daryl, my Mom, Hunter (although I tried to have MUCH more patience with him) and Tucker (our doggie).
But I'm happy to say as of today, Friday, I'm feeling MUCH BETTER! Not quite as tired, not quite as overwhelmed (although don't get me wrong, the stressors in my life have not gone anywhere) and not quite as MEAN to my family. Heh heh. Even Daryl said he noticed a difference last night, cuz he's been trying to get me to calm down and relax ALL WEEK.
So I spoke to a patient at my work who I have a very friendly relationship and she reminded me of something that I think I now often forget about it:
To take care of myself.
I admitted it is hard, once you've donned the cap of wife and mother, to make yourself a priority anymore. And I'm not even talking about just having a social life (which I no longer have) but I am not eating as well as I should be and I am very upset with myself cuz not only is that not benefiting me but I worry about Avery too. I have a hard time getting in enough fruits and veggies and healthy food.
And I don't ever give myself a BREAK. It's go, go, go all the time vacuuming, doing laundry, washing dishes, feeding and bathing Hunter, running to work, back home, eat dinner, checking up on Daryl's day and asking him if he took his diabetes meds (yes, I know he's my hubby and not my child, but I worry SOOOOO much about his health), clean up the dinner mess and then rinse and repeat all the housework before falling exhausted into bed. I can't even remember the last time I've read a BOOK, something I never thought I'd give up. I cry a LOT, feeling overwhelmed by it all. When does it get easier? Is it just the pregnancy hormones exacerbating everything?
I'm just so...very...tired. And I know that's not gonna get any better once a newborn is thrown into the mix but I just have to start making myself a priority again too!
WHY is this so hard to do??
Wednesday, December 01, 2010
Tuesday, November 23, 2010
Daryl and I have chosen/agreed upon what to call this baby, and we're both very happy. I love being able to call the baby in my belly by name, when I talk to her (and it was the same way with Hunter, as well).
Avery Irene C______ (sorry I don't wanna put our last name out into the Internet world LOL)
Avery was the girl's name we had chosen when I was first pregnant with Hunter, before we knew whether the baby was a boy or girl. I remember being at Babies R US and buying two sippy cups...one that said HUNTER and one that said AVERY, so I'd be prepared when we found out. I put away the Avery cup and kinda forgot about it until we were trying to come up with a girl's name we both agreed on. Avery was still at the top of the list but there were a couple other names we were throwing around...and yet, nothing else sounded right for the girl in my belly.
I was cleaning in my bedroom one day and found that AVERY sippy cup and it just clicked. This is our girl, this is her name. And Daryl agreed 100%.
Irene, her middle name, is after my Nana who passed away suddenly when I was thirteen. She was seriously THE BEST GRANDMOTHER EVER and her death was a huge blow to me. Not only was it the first time anyone close to me had passed, and the fact that it was traumatic (she was taken out by ambulance in the middle of my dance recital. No one told me till the end, of course. She passed away early the next morning), but I loved that woman more than words can say. My last memory of her is a great one, eating hot dogs and giggling before we left for my dance recital. Smelling the dozen red roses her and my grandfather had given me. I still have the card she gave me that night, "To our little dancing doll...".
And what better way to acknowledge and honor her, then to name my child after her?
Obviously, I love family names. Hunter's middle name, Richard, is my father's name. I will LOVE being able to tell my children all about these important people in their family, about their namesakes and what they each meant to me.
And Daryl is very happy with our decisions becuz unfortunately he never got to meet my father (nor my grandmother, who coincidentally this is my Dad's mother) and he told me it helps him to connect to that part of my family and to feel close. I tell him all the time how he would have loved them both and they would have LOVED him. He's heard so many stories and now he will get to hear me tell our children about their paternal grandfather and great-grandmother, when they are old enough to understand.
So there you have it, a baby name is born! (Now, just gotta wait for the BABY. Heh heh.)
Sunday, November 14, 2010
Hunter had his 15 month check up a week or so ago and all is well with my little (big!) man. He is 28 pounds, and measuring in at a whopping 32 1/2 inches. He's gonna be tall like his parents, and his Pop-Pop!
His eating habits are changing a little bit. He is still NOT a picky eater, however, he no longer eats EVERY morsel of food in front of him. Granted, he's teething big time right now so that could have something to do with it (we are down to the wire! It looks like only a good 4 teeth left?). He's had a fever of 102 degrees for two days now...although last I checked it had gone down one degree this afternoon. He's been a drooly mess and yesterday only seemed happy while gnawing away on the pizza crust while ignoring the rest of the pizza (normally his favorite part!).
And Mommy's sciatic pain is kicking in, woo boy! It's only in my right butt cheek and not insanely painful but still ANNOYINGLY uncomfortable. Especially when/if I've been carrying Hunter around a bit.
Oh, and get this? As flabby as I feel right now (and as HUGE as I feel), I've only gained TEN POUNDS SO FAR THIS PREGNANCY!! Holy crap! That amazes me becuz I gained something like 10-12 lbs. the first TRIMESTER with Hunter. LOL I guess the reason I look so huge and flabby (at least to myself...Daryl seems to think I look good but he's my hubby, so he could be biased!), other than the fact that I went into this pregnancy at my heaviest weight, is that everything is SO stretched out from the big belly I got last time. Makes me wonder how big this girlie is gonna be. I wonder if she'll be another 8 lb 11 oz-er like her brother was?
And speaking of Baby Girl, I am feeling her move SO much more now which has me thankful. I was feeling very down becuz of how rarely I felt her movements (due to her position. Last we checked she was breech and facing my back). I kept saying to myself that this being my second and last pregnancy, I really want to savor and appreciate every kick, punch and karate chop she delivers. It's bittersweet! And going back through my pregnancy journal from when I was preggo with Hunter, I remember JUST how active he was and from like 19 weeks on. So even though I felt this little girl MUCH earlier this time around, it was movements few and far between.
Well...not anymore! I'm happy to say that I think she most likely spun around so that she is facing my belly (even if I'm not sure if she still breech) becuz not only am I feeling her so much more but now I can feel and see her move from the OUTSIDE of my belly! Yay!
Also, we HAVE chosen little girl's name already but just haven't announced it yet. We were still trying to decide/agree on her middle name and I'm pretty positive her middle name will be after my Nana. So I promise to share it soon, once we've told family!
Now, onto facebook. I am NOT one to say how wonderful facebook is. HOnestly, it's just something to pass some time with, be nosey with what's going on in everyone else's lives and catch up on fun pictures my friends post. However, occasionally, facebook just gets it RIGHT. I reconnected today with an old friend who I literally haven't seen in years and years and I'm SO excited to have found her! Beth used to date my uncle, starting back when I was like a junior or senior in high school (she was in her early 20's at the time) and we became close. Even after she broke up with my uncle, she was a big part of mine and my mom's lives. But time, distance, some awkward family stuff caused us to lose touch and i was always sad about it. Today after "Friending" her on facebook, we chatted through email back and forth for an hour or two. Granted, a LOT has changed for both of us (my father died, my grandfather--who she knew well--died, I'm married now, own a house, have a baby and another one on the way....and for her she moved out of state, met an awesome man, moved back in state, went through some bad health issues, went back to school, got a a great career, and is talking with her man about adopting) but it was like no time had passed. We are going to meet for coffee probably the weekend after Thanksgiving, and i can hardly wait to reconnect in person.
So I'm admitting it here, FB DOES have it's advantages. Finding a long-lost friend ROCKS!
Now, onto the holiday-front. I've started my Christmas shopping already! WOO HOO, go me! I'm determined to enjoy my Christmas this year and not stress over last minute shopping and "will I have enough money to get gifts?" like last year. I've already purchased one of Hunter's and it's set to arrive next week and I've started saving up for Big D's gift. Now I just gotta focus on our parents and g-rents. ANy ideas of good thoughtul gifts?
Thursday, November 04, 2010
So, any last minute guesses? Thinking blue or pink?
Okay, I won't leave you hanging....
....we are having a....
I swear I'm in total and utter shock! While I wasn't 100% sure either way if the baby was a boy or girl, I think a part of me really believed it WOULD be another boy. This pregnancy has been SO different than my first, lots of nausea and puke in the 1st trimester, but I'm not one one to believe the old wive's tales so I still didn't think "Oh it could be a girl!"
And Baby Girl is modest! LOL When the u/s first started she had her little legs crossed, just about at the ankles. SO the tech continued to take all the measurements and every time we glanced at her legs crossed I'd joke about how this baby was modest so maybe it WAS a girl. I remember with HUnter his legs were spread WIDE!
The other issue making it harder to see is she is breach and she is sitting upright, using my bladder as a pillow under her behind (no WONDER I've been peeing even more so lately!) and her head kinda bent down towards her chin. SO she wasn't in the best position for viewing. I honestly started to wonder if we'd even GET the money shot!
Finally it was time so the tech had me flip on my right side facing the screen. No luck. So she asked me to flip to my left, facing AWAY from the screen. Longest few seconds ever becuz i couldn't see a darn thing but the wall!
When the tech announced, "It's a girl", Daryl said my mouth fell wide open. So while he hugged Hunter against him and said, "I KNEW it!" I was saying "Wow, I think I REALLY thought this would be another boy!"
She is doing great so far. 14 oz (so a little less than a pound!) and everything looks fabulous. MY low-lying placenta is no more...it's up high where it should be so that is a relief as well. Her heart rate was about 149...perfect! Unfortunately, no prize winning MONEY shot to share with you guys...Daryl reminded me later on that our u/s tech (she told us this with Hunter) doesn't do them becuz she doesn't feel it's appropriate. Whatever, it's my kid, lady. But I'm too happy to be annoyed!
Hunter is going to have a little sister and I couldnt' be happier!!!!!
Wednesday, October 27, 2010
Tuesday, October 19, 2010
Since I am going to be "Auntie April" to little Matthew (just as she is to my kid(s)), I couldn't resist buying this onesie: MY AUNTIE IS AWESOME.
Here are the two pregnant April's: me at 18 weeks and her at 32 weeks (doesn't she make you sick? The baby is ALL in her belly and nowhere else! That brat! LOL). Meanwhile I'm still at the point of only looking fat to some people (I know it's hard to see ANYthing in black). Well, in my defense it kinda depends on what type of shirt I'm wearing. Mostly it's just women (and people who already know me) who realize I'm pregnant. But I remember with Hunter I REALLY exploded after 20 weeks so I'm sure it's just a matter of time.
And speaking of my belly...Big D and I find out VERY SOON what the gender of this baby is!! November 4th to be exact! I'm so excited I can barely stand it. Does anyone want to wager a guess? Girl or Boy? Not to influence your decisions but my feeling is that it's another Boy and both Daryl and my Mom think it's a Girl. But honestly I think Daryl feels it's a girl only becuz he knows how badly I WANT one. ;-) I would LOVE to have my boy and girl, and knowing Hunter would be the caring big brother to a little sister would just warm my heart! And since this is our last pregnancy/child (unless an "oops" happens!) if I don't have a girl now, I will never have a daughter. I admit that does make me a little sad.
However, I wouldn't be sad to HAVE another boy becuz Hunter brings me more joy than I can ever articulate to anyone. I love the sweet and special bond we share and I would love to have that with another little baby boy. I love watching him push his cars around and say "Brrrrr" to imitate the motor and watch him try to ride his quad, while beeping the horn. And when he continually falls and tries to play in the dirt I just have to laugh becuz I know it will only continue as he grows. And to think of him having a special little brother to play with? I admit, it does make me feel all goose-bumpy and happy. So I guess what I'm trying to say is, I will be thrilled no matter what! I just can't wait to find out so that I can start some clothes shopping! We won't be working on a nursery for this little one, at least not right now, becuz we can't afford to do our upstairs (we live in a cape) which is where Daryl and I would move. Then our room would eventually become Baby #2's. So for now, I'm just gonna work on cleaning up and rearranging the furniture in our room to make space for the bassinet. And once I clear off the top of my long dresser (that no longer has the mirror on it) I will set up a changing station on top of that. Baby #2's clothes will hang in Hunter's closet, since we have plenty of room in there with the closet organizer. But I WILL have to clean out Hunter's closet cuz stuff that I put in there for storage will have to be relocated to either upstairs or the basement. While I'm kinda bummed I won't have a nursery to decorate this time around, I just keep reminding myself that eventually Baby Peanut will get his/her own room. :-)
So that's what happening in our lives currently! And now I'm off to go catch up on your blogs!