Wednesday, March 30, 2011

(WTF!!! STUPID BLOGGER deleted all my damn paragraphs so this looks like one big giant f'ing run on paragragh! I have no patientce to correct this right now) Holy crap. Can someone just shoot me now and put me out of my misery? I now truly realize how hard it is with two kids under the age of two years old. It started after a friend's daughter was so generous as to share her cold with Hunter. Now I've got a miserable, screaming, tantrum-throwing toddler who is constantly wiping his snot-filled nose on my sleeve, my chest, a pant leg. Oh, yeah, and tissues too. He DOES know how to blow his nose into a tissue but it's a short little blow so nothing much ever comes out INTO the tissue, just all over his face. Ugh. And yesterday was fussy newborn day. Avery was awake a LOT yesterday and did NOT want to be put down. Which wouldn't be such a big deal except, see above with sick toddler. Then throw in a visit to the pediatrician and you have GOOD TIMES all around. Yesterday was my first ever trip out ALONE with both kids. I was nervous, to say the least. But still I figured, "I gotta do it SOMEtime." Well, yesterday was the WRONG day for it. Heh. Both babies finally fell asleep on me but of course, it was literally like 45 minutes before I wanted to leave for the appointment. I waited too long, wanting them both to at least have gotten a 20 minute nap. But then I was hustling changing diapers, putting on Hunter's sneaks and coat, bundling Avery up in the car seat. And she had eaten an hour before so I started stressing she was gonna be hungry before we got to doctor's office (she has been doing some MAJOR cluster-feeding, I think becuz she ends up falling asleep on my boob. And when I don't get to feed her on both sides, she wakes up so much sooner. Not to mention Mama gets engorged and starts leaking like crazy!) So needless to say, Avery was cranky. She started screaming during her diaper change, and peed ALL OVER her entire sleeper and changing table. I started to sweat as I quickly slapped a newborn diaper on her, a clean dry sleeper and strapped her into her car seat. She continued to scream all the way out the door (as I struggled to help Hunter step down the two stone steps off our front door, yell at the dog to get back as HE freaked out--major dog anxiety--and attempted to get the baby's car seat out the door without bashing her into the door frame! I popped Avery into the car first and Hunter started running across the driveway, headed straight for a mud puddle. Nice. Thankfully I caught him in time and hastily swung him into his seat all the while inwardly cursing that I was already leaving 15 minutes later than I wanted to. I popped a binky into Avery's mouth, PRAYING it would help. She is very much unlike her brother (in the newborn stage at least) in that she does NOT seem to like the binky. She sometimes gags so I don't bother giving it to her. Hunter, on the other hand, was a huge sucker and wasn't happy UNLESS it was in his mouth. I buckled myself in and Hunter started whimpering, becuz he gets a tad upset/nervous when Avery is screaming HARD (which thankfully has only happened like once before. Her crying is usually very small and mouse-like). Once I turned the car on, the radio came on sorta loud but lo and behold...it quieted Avery right down! I immediately hopped on my cell and called my mom and started to cry in her ear. I said, "Next time you offer to help me out and I turn you down, remind me about today!" Heh heh. It suddenly dawned on me in our rush to get out the door, poor Hunter hadn't had lunch. "Damnit!" I said to my mom, ready to cry again. Once on the road, there was no traffic and I was making good time so I made a pit stop at Dunkin Donuts to get myself a decaf iced coffee and some munchkins for Hunter (TOTALLY forgetting I already had my bribe candy ready for the doctor's office...m-n-m's. HELLO, sugar overload.). He happily chowed down on his glazed munchkins and sippy of water and by the time we pulled into the doctor's office parking lot, I was only going on five minutes late. Not bad. Ignoring the throbbing sciatic pain I have been having in my butt cheek (which it's been about 3-4 days now and by last night, it would be radiating down into my left leg) I carried Avery in her car seat and struggled to hang onto Hunter's hand as we went into the building. I was SO nervous he'd pull away and run into the parking lot and now that I'm distracted with TWO kids, I know my response time wouldn't be as fast. Once in the exam room, my little girl got weighed and I'm happy to say she is back up and above her birth weight. Woo hoo! The doctor told me 7 lbs 6 oz but I just realized today that the nurse wrote down 7 lbs 9oz so I honestly have no idea which it was. I was too busy trying to keep Hunter from tearing the exam room apart as Avery got weighed. As the doctor examined her and we chatted, my little hellion realized how easy it was to open the exam room door and kept trying to make his grand escape. At one point, the Pediatrician reached out and snagged the collar of Hunter's coat to stop him from squeezing out the cracked open door and then immediately apologized, "I'm SO sorry for grabbing his coat like that, I just wanted to catch him!" I laughed and reassured him, I've done the SAME thing before! As Avery was examined and started crying cuz she was cold, Hunter got anxious again and wanted me to pick him up and hold him. But a minute later I had to put him down when we realized little Avery had left the pediatrician a lovely mustard-seed present in her diaper. When the visit was over, I asked if I could nurse her before leaving and the doctor smiled and said no problem, and that he'd put the "Do Not Disturb-Nursing Mom" sign up on the door. (I love this! Do all pedi offices do this?) Once he was gone I whipped out a boob and started to feed the cranky girl...JUST as Hunter started to whip the door open!!! I literally 2-stepped across the room with Avery hanging off me, and slammed the door shut. From that moment on, I nursed her while sitting on the doctor' rolling stool...so that I could literally sit in front of and block the door from Hunter. He started to throw a tantrum and it was distracting Avery so THAT'S when I frantically said, "Hunter! Get the m-n-m's out of Mommy's bag!" His brown eyes widened and a smile lit up his face as he said, "M-m's???" and raced over to the diaper bag. Oh yes, I'd resorted to the candy bribe. I fed him one piece of chocolate at a time as my little girl leisurely drank her lunch, like we had ALL the time in the world. Hunter had chocolate, pink drool (they were leftover Valentine's Day m-n-m's) all over his chin, snot running out of his nose and I snagged a tissue and started wiping it all up. By the time we left the office, I was covered in snot, chocolate and breast milk. Gotta love it. I then had to carry Hunter on my hip and Avery in her seat on my other arm, out of the office, because a certain toddler was on the verge of a tantrum when he realized he was not going to get to see the fishies on the way out. I let him carry the keys once we were out of the office and in the hallway, and he happily toddled towards the door, crying out "Keys! Keys!". A nice woman who had her arms full of a briefcase, papers and files, saw me struggling with the door and said "Here let me get the door!" I REALLY wasn't sure how she'd fare much better, getting the door open but then she kicked it open. Perfect! Once we made it out to the car, I took the keys from Hunter and unlocked the door, set poor Avery's car seat down at my feet and proceed to lift a tantrum-throwing little boy, kicking and screaming into his car seat as he screamed, "KEYS! KEYS!". Then remembering how closely I'd parked to the car on the driver's side, I struggled just as much to get her car seat into the narrowly opened door (trying hard not to whack my car door into the car beside me). And when finally IN the car, I cranked the tunes back up, this time to drown out Hunter's cries and just laughed like a crazy person. How do you think I did on my first day out with the two kids? ;-)

7 comments:

Kat said...

Oh man. I hate days like those. But it WILL get better. I promise!!!! Just keep saying to yourself, "this too shall pass!" It really does. Before you know it the two kiddos will be playing together, healthy, everyone will have a schedule, and all will be right in the world again. Right now all you have to do is survive. It is survival mode time, baby! You can do it! :)

Sarah R said...

Hugs!! I will promise you that it DOES get easier, trust me. You are still in the crazy insane first month!! Hang in there. ♥

Amy said...

Okay here are my top 2 pieces of advice.

1. At least one of them will ALWAYS poop when you are running late getting out the door. ALWAYS. If it is Hunter, you make a quick executive decision - if the poop is solid and not smooshed all over his tush and the diaper, flush the poop down the toilet and leave the diaper on. I call it "Mommy is making an executive decision!" Especially when you've changed them like 2 seconds earlier!

2. Get a double stroller. And make Hunter stay in it. He will not want to sit in your lap when you want him to. For the first time last week I let Gabrielle walk with me in the store as I carried Julia. She held my hand the entire time. We were in Lowe's. It was empty. I wouldn't have cared if she ran ahead of me. When I want her to stay with me, she doesn't. I have the Graco double, and I think you can pop the car seat in the back seat and Hunter can ride up front.

It gets easier. Until Avery moves out of the infant seat and you have to strap her in and out every where you go. That's a pain. I do miss the infant car seat!

Ha, my word verification is pithee. The antithesis of this comment!

Sarah said...

Hugs. It will get easier. At least I'm hoping...for myself, too ;)

I've taken them out a few times by myself. One dr Appt and two times to the store. What a challenge! I find it is easier to get Alice in the car first and out last, but only if the weather is nice. Otherwise he goes in first and comes out last. Which leaves Alice unattended for a minute, so be quick and run after them! ;) the dr visit was a nightmare. She kept running off, so I had to chase her down.

CanadianMama said...

I find it super hard having two and my oldest is a year older than Hunter so I can only imagine how hard it must be for you right now. That would be tough on anyone, let alone a new mama who isn't getting much sleep! Hang in there lady - it does get easier (seriously, I found the worst age was 18 months to 2.5 years but that after 18 months every month got easier).

Also, both my boys would gag on the soother but if I persisted they would take it. Didn't take long for either of them to stop gagging and just take it - DON"T GIVE UP lol!!

Nicole said...

Oh, Momma! I remember those days well! Like everyone else said, it will get easier. I second Amy with the double stroller - C.ooper had no idea that he could get out and walk until he was well past 3 because it was the only thing he knew! Hang in there!

Heidi Renée said...

My neighbor friend has two daughters (3 and 1) and I often go along with her on errands. It gives me someone to talk to and her an extra pair of hands! I consider it training for when I'm in your situation. :)